I used to think confidence would come when I finally had everything “together.” When I fixed the parts of me I didn’t like. When I became less shy, more polished, more sure.

But the truth?

Confidence didn’t come wrapped in perfection. It came wrapped in choice.

It came through moments when I showed up anyway—shaky voice, unsure heart, and all. It came in speaking up before I felt completely ready. It came in saying “I like myself today” even if I didn’t love every piece. It came in choosing to be when I could’ve chosen to hide.

As an adult, confidence hasn’t been a switch that flipped. It’s been a quiet, consistent unfolding.

It started when I got to know myself deeply—what I liked, what I wanted to improve, what made me proud, and what needed healing. And with time, I realized confidence wasn’t about becoming someone new… it was about returning to who I was before the world tried to dim it.

And now, I get to model that for my daughter.

The clip I posted of Maddie talking about someone not liking her hair—watching her advocate for herself in that moment—felt like a reflection of all the quiet work I’ve done to become confident. The kind that’s soft but sure. The kind that isn’t afraid to say: “Your opinion doesn’t define me.”

So here’s my reminder to you:

Confidence isn’t loud.

It’s not fearless.

It’s not flawless.

It’s simply choosing to show up—even if your hands shake and your heart pounds.

It’s showing up when no one claps.

It’s showing up for you.

And that’s more than enough.

You don’t have to wait until you feel ready, love.

Just begin. That’s how confidence grows.